Can I be real and vulnerable with you for a minute? Where did these wrinkles, rolls, grey hairs, and cellulite come from? I mean seriously, I knew you changed as you got older, but I’m not a fan of these changes! Over the last 4 years I’ve had a lot of changes and struggles with them. Who hasn’t struggled with their appearance at some point in their life? Whether it was in middle school, high school, in their twenties, thirties or later (or a little of all of them)? If you haven’t I’d love to know your secret, (as I’m sure others would as well)!
Well, I’ve really been struggling with how I view myself lately. After two babies and 4 years of marriage (let’s just say I embraced the whole letting yourself go a little too well), I’m not liking what I see when I look into the mirror.
I’ve always put a lot of stock in my appearance and how others viewed me. I was always worried about how thin I was, how my makeup looked, how I dressed, how many heads I could turn as I walked past others, and overall how many people liked me. You could say that I found my self worth in how others viewed and treated me. Until recently I would tell you that vanity wasn’t an issue for me, but I would have totally been lying to your face. Over the last 4 years God has really been challenging my view of self and speaking His truth into my life. God is definitely working on where I find my worth.
“Do I really believe I am who the Bible tells me I am? Or do I put my worth in who the world tells me I am?”
I am now a mother to two beautiful children, Peyton (almost 2 years old) and Matthew (3 months old) and I wouldn’t change that for the world. They are amazing and even though they don’t know it yet, they help sanctify me daily (and sometimes hourly). Needless to say after having two babies (by c-section), within two years of each other, it has completely changed my body. I am no longer that little 20 something year old that could turn heads (although my husband says he still sees me that way). The way I view myself and where I find my worth has had to change.
As I’ve been struggling with my self-image, I’ve asked God to reveal to me how He sees me, and He delivered (as He always does). He has shown me verse after verse in His Word how much He loves me, and how He has wonderfully made me. (Psalm 139:13-14) We have these verses painted in our daughter’s room and as I rock her to sleep I see it daily. Only recently, did I start to really understand that it still applies to how God views me.
He knew exactly how I would look and who I would be today and He still thinks I am wonderfully made! Not only am I fearfully and wonderfully made but I am also made in His image (Genesis 1:27) and He sees me as precious! (Isaiah 43:4) My worth is found in Him, not in the way I look. It is still hard to wrap my head around that! I need to be more concerned with who I am on the inside than with how I look on the outside (1 Peter 3:3-4).
I don’t want to be remembered for my looks, but how I earnestly sought the Lord with all my heart, mind, and soul. I want others to see me as a woman who loves God first (Proverbs 31:30). Jesus needs to be and should be my first love and priority! My worth is found in Him, not in the way I look. I need to be more concerned with who I am in Christ instead of how I see myself in the mirror (1 Peter 3:3-4). As His child, I am a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) and I can’t continue to think the way I used to before I was His child. He saw me, loved, and wanted me before I ever knew Him. I must remember this when I feel like I am unworthy! When I put my faith in Jesus Christ, I was adopted and became a co-heir with Him (Romans 8:14-17). I am His daughter and I should view myself as Jesus does! My body is His temple (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) and I must treat it that way.
Let this be an encouragement to any of you reading this today. Your value comes from Him and how others view you is irrelevant! You are loved, wanted by the Creator of the Universe, and He provides the true definition of beauty.